If it makes you feel better, many have this exact feeling, but without the $15 million.

A major contributor to stress is gone. 

But there are different levels of FI. I think most people still have to show some restraint to stay on budget.

I don't get bored at all, but I am able to travel a lot and my hobbies fill my time.  I feel like I don't have enough time.

Having more time is probably as important as having the money for many people.  Not having a boss and all of the job stress helps as well.

For me, FIRE was as good as I planned.  Lots and lots of planning.

Nine figures is going to give you this same realization and you will have wasted more of your life chasing it.  You have $15 million, you don’t need more money.  Now start the real work of discovering who you are and what you like.

Creating as much time with people I love as is possible with as little worry as possible.

Not being able to speak will affect your career just as it will affect your entire life. There's no ignoring that. But I will say that this is one career where most communication can be done via email or IM so it might actually suit you better than other options.

Might be able to offer more advise if you'd be willing to better define how your ability to talk is "going away." Is this a confidence thing where you'd benefit from having more practice? Stuttering? Dyslexia? Aphasia? Throat cancer? Face blindness leaves you unable to recognize who you're talking to? Permanent injury from a bad case of strep throat? Can't stop cursing the name Bob Saget?

Does it affect all communication or only speech?

That's EXACTLY how you explain it.

"There's only so much I can go into detail but a big factor in me looking for another position, long story short, is that someone repeatedly threatened to hurt my family, and I'm not interested in working in that kind of environment."

That's very understandable.

I’ve been told ‘mo money, mo problems’. Cannot confirm.

>How would you approach this?

Probably by looking for a new job. A "cheap" company is going to do the bare minimum to keep me, so unless I have an offer in hand that I'm willing to take, the bare minimum is probably going to be some small token efforts. There is nothing you can verbally say to an employer to stop them from being cheap.

Any problem that can be solved with money is not a problem anymore.

But you still have problems. Family stresses, children, personal fulfillment goals.

This sounds like a very easy accommodation to make in this field. You'll have some challenges interviewing, but you can be upfront about it before you find yourself on any call.

I might recommend getting a camera setup that shows your hands typing so folks can see that you're actually the one communicating with them. There's enough fake interviewers that this would be the only concern, and that alleviates it. That's the main reason folks want a phone call / zoom call during interviews - To communicate with the person live.

Worst case, you just got some excellent practise and it seems you know how to get better. Keep at it!

It takes practice. Not mock interview practice, not solving leetcode problems by yourself, but the actual act of doing a real, live, interview with real stakes.

You can't really recreate that level of stress outside of the real thing.

Don't worry about it. Everyone fails live coding assessments every now and then. I do too, with 11 years of experience.

>I felt like I couldn’t google anything I would usually

Ask your interviewers. They're your new Google. They'll be happy to clarify commonly googled things like syntax questions.

You also don't have to be *perfect* in these interviews. This company may have DQ'd you over it, but another company might not.

The company I'm at now had a backend portion to the live coding assessment which I crushed, and they also had a frontend portion which I failed gloriously at. I'm not great at frontend, which I did make very clear, but adding the stress of doing it live made me do especially bad.

Still got the offer.

1k/day regardless of if I decide to go to work.

My wife and I both have remote jobs now, so we let our lease end and have started just living and working out of AirBnBs in different parts of the country. Feels like a taste of what I want when I can stop working, but something that I can do now.

The freedom to do whatever i want whenever i want for me and my loved ones

Study, network, apply, fix resume. Not much else to it really besides maybe some luck.

Back from Great Smokey Mountains National Park.  It far exceeded expectations - unforgettable beauty.  (I was also surprised at how gaudy the main strip in Gatlinburg is.)

We had several bear encounters, including a stressful one on Chimney Tops Trail.  An adolescent emerged from the woods about 30 ft away and starting walking towards us.  We stood our ground making a lot of noise (reaching for our air horn and bear spray), and fearing that a big parent may be nearby.  But the bear was just curious, and wandered back into the woods.

On the last day, we hiked up to [LeConte Lodge](https://lecontelodge.com/) on the Alum Cave trail.  11 miles round trip, and 3000 ft of elevation change.  Coming back down in the misty rain we crossed paths with a with a senior park ranger who told us many stories about black bear encounters.  We had to wait at the bluffs while some other rangers extracted an injured hiker (the helicopter couldn't get close due to cloud cover).  Hats off to those rangers - tough job!

At the beginning of the month, we did a road trip across Western Canada. I’m glad I did it then because Jasper townsite is now basically gone from wildfires. JPN was our favorite, and now it’s just burning. 

To make this FI related-don’t wait to do the things you’ve dreamed of doing. They may not still be the same when you get around to doing them.

Who wants to keep track of old 401k plans? Unless your new plan is terrible I would roll it over

I feel you are boxing yourself in by saying that you don’t like to do “normal” people things. TBH, few of us actually feel normal. My suggestion is to give an earnest attempt at new hobbies and new relationships. According to folks like Huberman, you have to build these neuropathways that don’t already exist. It will feel awkward and uncomfortable at first but then it should become easier and you can hopefully find enjoyment. It takes time but you have time. It might be worth a try. Good luck

You have three options:

1. Leave it in the current 401K. Do this if you like the investment options/fees better than your new company options/fees.

2. Move it to the new company's 401K program. Do this if the new company has better investment options/fees than your current 401K.

3. Roll it into a "Rollover IRA" - just like it sounds. Set up an IRA (or use an existing one) and arrange for transfer of the funds into an IRA where you can choose the investment company and investment options. 

I've done both #1 and #3. I have a former company 401K that has absurdly low fees for the various funds and good investment options, so I've kept it. My natural inclination is to suggest #3 since it gives you the most control over your investments. 

The amount of match is irrelevant to your decision since it will cease at your old company when you leave and start at your new company when you open a new 401K with them.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

I think the fact that your company is having a Process Engineer do all of their SWE work is your answer... they're not going to pay SWE salaries because they don't need a SWE. They have a Process Engineer who is doing that work for a Process Engineer salary.

If the company wanted a SWE, they would've hired a SWE, and paid SWE prices. If you quit, they're probably not going to replace you, they'll probably find another "Not-SWE" to start learning how to hack together what you started.

So I doubt they're going to toss a massive 50% raise at you...

If I were you, I would have the conversation with my boss anyways. I wouldn't approach it asking for them to bring my salary up to SWE-market-rate, I know that's not going to happen. But I would approach it with 2 goals in mind.

1. I would try to get converted to be 100% SWE with no change in pay. I'm already doing that work anyways, this would just mean I don't have to mix my SWE duties with Process Engineer duties.
2. If that's not possible because they can't hire a new Process Engineer, I would at least work on convincing them to officially change my title to SWE. If I'm doing 80% SWE-work, and 20% Process Engineer work, I want my title to reflect what the majority of my work is.

Maybe I can get a *small* raise out of that conversation, but that wouldn't be my primary purpose. The purpose of both those goals is to prepare me for finding another job elsewhere as a pure-SWE.

When companies background check me, I want this company to report that my title was SWE. I want to be able to put SWE on my resume, and tailor my resume to focus on my SWE duties and ignore my Process Engineer duties.

You need to find a company that wants to hire a SWE if you want SWE salaries. Not a company that wants a Process Engineer to code.

Can we see a resume?  Most SWEs aren’t especially good at writing resumes but resumes are all that employers know about you.  There also a lot more competition these days so a resume is more important.

Fun fact, depending on your local laws, if software development is not part of your main job duties, you may be able to claim copyright on all your software you wrote.

I’m going to be contrary here.  Roll the 401k into your new employer’s 401k.  Don’t roll it into an IRA.  By not having an IRA, you can then do a backdoor Roth every year with no taxes.  Backdoor Roths get a tax proration based on how much you have in a traditional IRA.  But 401ks don’t count in the calculation, only traditional IRAs.  Now you’ve got a Roth IRA that you can add to every year, regardless of income level.  That’s how I’ve always done it.

I had the exact same assignment, draggable resizable components. I opened the code sandbox and my mind just blanked. It’s an assignment I’d never expected since I was practicing more ‘general’ things. Flunked as well, got ghosted and felt so bad I didnt even wanted to ask for feedback lmao

I joined my dream job 1.5 months back at one of the biggest companies of my industry (advertising).

I had to wait a month to even have my reporting manager acknowledge that I exist, even though he hired me.

When that finally happened, I was assigned to report to a senior who's probably 4-5 years elder to me, and he's been a NIGHTMARE.

1. In our first interaction, told me how he's going to be "harsh but not abusive" and how his ways have made people quit.

2. Then, he started making me stay late for NO reason. LITERALLY NO WORK had to be done.

3. The worst - after finishing my actual work, he has been wanting me to work on miscellaneous '"assignments" to "improve my skills". These include watching documentaries, studying different advertising concepts, and then GIVING A TEST ABOUT THOSE THE NEXT DAY.

For one "assignment", he made me write a bunch of taglines, which he then made me re-write twice, and gave me a deadline of 11:59 pm. When I told him it's 10pm and I genuinely am too tired to frame coherent sentences after a full day of work, he told me "it's okay, be incoherent".

At 11:30pm, he texted me if I don't send the lines in, I will be punished with 6x more of the work. Which I was.

When I reported this to my Manager, i.e. our Boss, he told me this was reflecting poorly on me and this is a "rite of passage" and I shouldn't expect things to change. One other Manager accused me of whining.

I cannot handle this. The anxiety is absolutely destroying me.

  
**Am I really just whining?**

Quitting 1st job after 1.5 months because of toxic senior. Am I overreacting?

Back in January of this year I bought a used 2016 civic with 117k miles for 17k after tax and GAP, but for the past three months my car has been giving me various misfire issues, sludge in the engine, burning oil and coolant. I am not asking for what I should I have done in the past, I realize it was dumb to buy in terms of financial choices but what's done is done. What I am really asking is what is my best choice to offload the car, cause I might be looking at needing a new engine. Rolling the negative equity into a lease or a much cheaper older car?

Still owe $16k on a used car, don't have money saved to pay it down and its basically dying

Goal is 100k by 30!  
[https://imgur.com/a/kbcSXRW](https://imgur.com/a/kbcSXRW)  

Not quite the millions people post about, but almost at 73k net worth at 27!

I'm always baffled by this. **I can see asking for your current salary, and I can see asking for a minimum salary.** **But what the heck to they mean asking for my "salary range"** for a position I may interview for?  Do they expect me to say "$180K-200K and I won't take a penny more!". In this case it's an in-house recruiter, so I know any number I mention at the low end will probably be the highest they offer.

The only way I can think of making it a range is to say "180+ for good work-life balance, $220K if you expect lots of OT" or something.

I prefer to duck the question, but I want the interview. I had my best salary negotiation by refusing to tell them my current salary, or my minimum, and just told them "you decide what the position is worth to you" and I got a decent offer. But I already had them hooked, and didn't need to move, so it was easier to play hardball.

Edit: to emphasize that of course I understand what my desired salary is, but why would they ask for a RANGE? Do the really expect me to turn down their offer because it is HIGHER than what I asked for? What's the point of **my** setting an upper bound?

What do recruiters even expect when asking for "Salary Range"

Hey not sure if this the right kind of post for this sub, but I am sure at least a few of you may have experienced something similar.

For some context I just turned 20M and am going into my third year of university. I have worked for 5 years now and discovered FIRE when I was 16. I have now saved up 40k in my tax advantaged accounts and am set to graduate with no debt. I grew up low middle class, my parents were house rich but very poor after the mortgage was paid, had to skip some meals lights went out a few times, ect. But they are in a comfortable position now, and we had agreed i would start paying rent once I'm out of school.

The other day I told my parents how well my investments have been doing and that I had broken past the 40k mark and instead of congratulating me they decide to tell me i need to start paying rent, and that I have to pay my older brothers debt of $800. And when I go to vent about this to my gf of 4 years when she found out how much money I have she asks me why she had to pay me back for her $80 ticket to an amusement park despite the hundreds I have spent on her, plus all the money I've straight up given her.

My friends know I have a good chunk of money and always tell me I'm cheap and should spend some money on them like buying them a drink ect, which I do just not all the time.

I'm just starting to feel like I'm alone I only bring up my money to these people to show them it works and how they could do it for themselves.

EDIT: I guess I should also mention my parents recently got 200k settlement and make over six figures when combined salary they are no longer paycheck to paycheck for about 6 years now. I only work part time and have never made more than 20k in a year. And us going to the amusement park was supposed to be the first time my gf paid for herself on a date.

My money is making people treat me differently and I don't like it

I’m going to try my best to keep this short. About a couple of months ago my Uncle in Ghana passed away and my Mom needed to get a plane ticket to Ghana. She called me to help her book a plane ticket and I did. It wasn’t until later when I got an email from Affirm telling me that I had an upcoming monthly payment on a loan with 33% APR. When I confronted my Mom about this she said that she did it in my name to help me build credit. Since then she’s been sending me the money to pay for the monthly payments and then I pay for them. 

Today she contacted me saying that she needed to buy a plane ticket to Atlanta and she wanted to use my Affirm account. I told her no because I already have student loan debt and I don’t want more debt. Additionally I told her that nothing on the internet says that BNPL helps with your credit and that I don’t want it to have any sort of negative impact on my finances. 

She goes into a narcissist rage saying that because she took out a parent plus loan for me during my freshman year of college, she should be able to take out loans in my name whenever she wants. She also stated that because she helped me build my finances (made me an authorized user on a card when I was first starting to build my credit) she should have access to anything she wants in my name and that is it wasn’t for her “I wouldn’t even have a credit report”. She ends this by saying that she will no longer be sending me the money to pay for the first Affirm loan she took out in my name and that I should never contact her again. 

I’ve contacted Affirm to place a freeze on my account because I know that she is not above fraud ( I watched her commit PPP loan fraud before I knew that what she was doing was a crime and she once tried to encourage me to commit fraud against my Dad) but is there anything I can do about the first loan she initially took out? I don’t want to be held responsible for a loan that I never authorized and was lied to about. 


Mom took out a BNPL loan in my name and will not pay it off unless I let her take out another one. What should I do?

My husband (M 27) and I (F 28) have interesting finances and are not yet in a place to need a financial advisor but do need some advice to hopefully retire early. We also have a 1yo.

I make 170k in my full time job and work several extra shifts where before tax I'm closer to 210k/yr. Husband makes about 80k/yr.   
We recently moved out of our first home and are trying to rent it out, it has not yet been rented but only vacant for 1 month. Mortgage on that home is $2,600 and we're hoping to rent it for $3,000. (Just decreased asking from 3,200 to hopefully get it rented this month, this seems to be about market value).  
The home we're living in mortgage is $4,900. Our total monthly expenses are roughly $10-12k/month and that leaves room for us to contribute to 401k, and put money in savings. I owe 16k for my car (3% interest), he owes 28k (7.4% interest). No CC debt.

I have 20k in 401k and he has 30k. I started an investment acct for LO's college with $2k right now, mostly investing in S&P funds through fidelity.

We have 170k in HYSA's (avg 4-4.5% interest). I would like to be doing more with that money and I don't know what. I feel like I need to keep 60k in a HYSA as an emergency fund, but that leaves 120k that I feel like we're not doing enough with. It is not enough to buy real estate cash where we live (south fl) and I rather not do long distance real estate investments. Should I just put all of that in mutual funds? My goal is to be able to go to very occasional part time by 45.

Trying to build wealth retire early

Hi there! 

I'm a newb to this community, so please forgive me if I am asking redundant questions. However, I think everyone's situation is a bit different. 

Here's my family's scenario:

- family of 4 (me, my husband, and his 2 kiddos - a 16 year old girl and 18 year old boy that is on the autism spectrum).

- I have numerous chronic health conditions that prevent me from working outside the home because each day and level of pain is different. I have filed for SSI disability in April 2023 and now I'm the queue to be processed, but my state has an average wait time of 18-24 months, routine denials and appeals, and an 86-90% denial rate. Nearly every case has to be brought before a judge for a decision - and that can take up to 3-5 years, depending on workload.

To keep my mind occupied, I went back to school to earn my bachelor's of fine arts in graphic design online. Vocational Rehabilitation covers the costs of books, tuition, supplies, materials, tuition, internet, and fuel mileage to/from all medical appointments, as well as my health insurance premium each month. While there is a LOT of paperwork and red tape to deal with using VR, I cannot complain because they have provided me EVERYTHING I need to be successful - even new MacBook pros, iPad Pro, cloud storage, software.... The list goes on. 

- My husband works as a automotive technician in a new car dealership about 35 minutes each way from home. He has been in the industry for over 25 years. His current employer and direct manager seem to be decent to work with and he likes this job so much better than the last.

HOWEVER, when he started at this current job one year ago this past February, he hired on at $25/hour with the lromoiof a review in 90 days and the possibility of raise if he produced quality, profitable work with little to no customer comebacks (customer complaints). My husband has excelled at this job because he is the most experienced in this shop of 25-30 lifts, besides the senior mainline master  mechanic. He received his raise of $1/he by June 1, 2023, placing him at $26/hr. 

But, about two months ago, his manager approached him about possibly becoming the shop foreman - watching over the other mechanics, assisting them with tasks they are not fluent or efficient with, and generally coaching the team towards better and fast completion rates, upsells, and general increase in their skill set/knowledge. 

One would think that this was an opportunity to move up - it is a supervisory position that comes with added responsibility, extra accountability, becoming lead trainer for new employees, and less time of my husband working on his own lift - and that it would come with a raise. Bot no. I'm baffled at the arrangement because he went from $26/hr to $15/he and then he makes 50¢ off of every hour the other mechanics he supervises, bills out. For example, just for my husband being at the shop from 8-5, he will make $120/day base pay. If the 4 techs under him can bill 8 hr/day each, that is a total of 32 hours x 50¢ - or $16/day in commission. That's roughly at $680/week gross paycheck. By the time taxes, insurance, retirement, etc are deducted, he might come home with a $500/week paycheck. 

Before this change in position, as a regular automotive tech, he could easily flag 38-45 hrs/week at $26hr = $1092 gross/week (based on 42 hours/week) - an average of nearly $700-725/week net.

That is a loss of about $800 per month (about $200 per week).

I should also mention that if he and his team can meet monthly quotas for upsells and accuracy percentages, he is eligible for a $500/month bonus (averages out to $125/week). Even with the monthly bonus he is still making less now than he was, though he will not listen to me. He's such a pushover when it comes to working and helping others - easily taken advantage of, maybe because when he's the martyr, he's getting that attention, praise, and "atta boy" that he secretly ut desperately craves. 

Otherwise, logically and mathematically, I can't make sense of the numbers. 

My husband the sole income earned for our household. Since my stepson turned 18 and is considered a legal adult (although realistically, he's 12 years old mentally and emotionally), the SSA cut his monthly disability benefits. We are currently awaiting a new case manager to assist in helping him regain those benefits and add any other possible benefits for him. 

Needless to say, our expenses each month surpass the monthly income, leaving us to bridge the gap with credit cards, and at times (against my will or consent) payday loans. I hate payday loans because the APR is 299.00% compounding. Each week, the payday loan company automatically takes half of my husband's paycheck to make that payment. 

We live in a 714 sq ft, 3 br/1 ba early 1900s bungalow with a basement. Since we rent the house, we are responsible for all utilities, trash, and yard maintenance. 

Here's our monthly breakdown;

Water/electric: ~$200.00

Natural Gas: ~60.00

Rent: $350.00 (our portion as my parents help us with the remaining $400 each month)

Groceries: ~$150.00/week

Fuel for my husband (commutes about 400 miles/week): $400.00

Fuel for my vehicle (mostly reimbursed by VR): $250.00

Streaming services (we do not have cable or satellite TV) ~$75.00

Monthly vehicle maintenance: ~$25/mo unless an emergency repair pops up

Vehicle insurance: ~$170.00

Household insurance (renter's insurance) ~$30.00

CCLI insurance for my husband and me: ~$30.00

Vehicle extended warranty/service plan (husband's vehicle): $150.00

2 vehicle loan payments: $1,276.00

Internet service (reimbursed by VR): $89.99

Health insurance premium (me only): ~$70.00 (reimbursed by VR)

Credit card payments: ~$1,050.00 (~$40,000 credit card debt + accruing interest averaging 25%)

Payday Loan: ~350.00 (+200.00% APR - original loan amount was $1,350.00 - current balance with interest as of today - $1,754.13, even after $675.00 in payments so far)

Monthly subscriptions used for school (cloud storage, reference sites, stock art, etc.):  ~$80.00 (reimbursed by VR)

Medical bill payments: ~30.00

Trash service: $60.50 every 3 months (~$20.17/mo)

Cell phone service: ~$200.00 for 2 lines and phones 

Husband insists on eating out every day at lunch during the week: $400.00

Entertainment/Dining Out together: ~$250.00

Pet care/supplies/food: $175 every 6 weeks

--------
Total monthly outflow: ~$6,000-7,000

Husband's income: ~$2,400.00
Monthly Bonus (if earned): $500.00
Monthly VR reimbursement: ~$740.00
Pet sitting side hustle (not reliable or steady) - Average of ~$60/mo +/-

TOTAL INCOME: ~$3,860.00

Overbudget: ~ $2140.00-3140.00

This is a crisis. 

I know the credit card debit, vehicle payments, payday loan and the cut in my husband's salary, and my physical inability to work because of my health are the pain points. However I am overwhelmed and at a loss as to how to even make and balance a budget with this much disparagement. 

I've thought about making an appointment with either financial planner or debt counselor to see if they can help me work out a plan. My state offers a free service for debt counseling. I met with them once and their only solution was bankruptcy, which I couldn't even afford to pay for. 

We are in our mid-to-lats 40s and really do not want to do bankruptcy as we have a dream to build a home on part of my parent's acreage in the country. Currently, our credit scores are around the 615-625 mark and we are utilizing 51-56% of our credit (keeping the credit score low due to the debt ratio).

I know this is a long shot, but does anyone have any legitimate suggestions or resources to make a plan and then this situation around? I am sick of the daily stress. DCF claims that we make too much each month - the calculate off of the gross income, although no one lives off their gross income - so we are not eligible for SNAP or LIHEAP (utility assistance program) assistance.

My husband refuses to discuss our finances - I think mostly because he knows we're in so deep and it feels like the weight of it is all on his shoulders, that he's not doing s good enough job, etc. He does like to bury and avoid issues. So frustrating. 

Any logistical help would be appreciated - resources, software for planning, etc 

Thank you. :)

Seemingly always digging a deeper hole with no way out - advice? 

Since graduating college 20 years ago, I've had 11 jobs. That's an average of 1.8 years/job. I was laid off from 3 out of the 11 jobs. The other 8 were resignations stemming usually from unhappiness in the role or where I was at that point in my life.

They've all kind of been in the same vein: white collar, middle management. Today, I have my first senior level role. But after nearly a year, I feel it on the verge of ending. Despite doing an overall good job, a critical failure has had a lasting impact, and I believe my job is now in jeopardy.

I just can't understand why I can't seem to stay in one job for more than two years on average (I had just one go for four years). For some reason, I envy people who can stay in one job - or at least stay in the same company - for years. To me, it's the mark of success and stability when someone can do that.

Yes, I know that in today's job market, it can take changing jobs to get a promotion and raise. That's what happened to me: every job change, save for one, came with a significant raise and promotion that I might not have received had I stayed.

However, I still feel so ashamed and lost because of my 11 jobs in 20 years. After a particularly rough afternoon at work - my boss called me in once again to deal with the ramifications of the failure I mentioned earlier, I broke down. Why can't I seem to find a profession/job/career that lasts?

Anyone have any advice on what to do? Or maybe a different way of looking at this career history?

Does Anyone Else Feel Like A Failure For Not Being Able To Hold Down A Job For More Than 2 Years?

I am in my early 20s, immigrant, and working in business consulting and financial services for 1.5 years. This is my first full-time job.

I have made great progress at work, they were thinking to train and sponsor me.

However, lately, i have been dropping the ball (almost all due to lack of attention to detail). The latest one was a client came back to go over a report as it they were finalizing the transition from father to son (son will buy the business). The report was done 4 months ago and we only realized now that the i counted something twice. 

What should I do? I'm not even sure what went wrong when I'm careful and I double checked. Should I just resign after admitting and rectifying my mistake?

Made a $700k mistake at work - how to deal with it? Help please

Hey everyone. I hope that I will be able to find some like-minded people. I have no one who I can really talk to about this stuff. I doubt that anyone would get me. I'm going through a phase of reflection right now and I feel like I've lost my drive. I feel like I'm at a crossroad and I'm not sure which path to take.  
I guess I'm just looking for any input, any ideas or thoughts from people that have been in a similar position.

I am in the beginning of my 30s with a self-made NW of roughly $15m, most of it in liquid investments.  
I guess it's the typical story of how I wanted to be rich and always chased money. Now I guess I am and it doesn't make me happy, surprise surprise. Got a nice car, nice place to live in in a good state, a lovely wife and a cat.

I made a lot of sacrifices over recent years. Not many "real" friends, no real hobbies or interests outside of work etc. However, I also never enjoyed "normal" activities much. I'm probably autistic, which might explain all of this. Back in the days I was happy meeting friends, smoking weed with them and playing some games. Life was simple. Nowadays I deal with news, politics, markets, lawyers and pretentious a\*\*holes. I don't spend much money. I feel nothing when I get more, but I feel emotional when I lose money. In the recent months I started questioning my current way of living and feel like I've lost my mojo. There are two voices fighting in my head:

* "Take a step back. Spend some time on discovering new things that you might enjoy. Focus on yourself"

Honestly, this is mostly the sentiment you hear from "normal" people. I came to this point by not being "normal". Maybe this is why I feel such a resistance to this approach. Based on past experiences, I'm not happy just "chilling" and feel like I'm wasting my time. I doubt that long-term I'd be happy with this approach.

* "Double down. Aim for that 9-figure net worth!" Why? To me wealth is just a meme. It's not about the number. I won't fly a helicopter or live in a Hollywood mansion. More money won't make a difference for me. I don't think there is much meaning to life by default. My meaning so far came from work and constantly improving. Never standing still

If I'd stop chasing such dreams (by going for approach 1) will I look back at myself in 10-years from now and regret my decision to not keep on going? I need something to strive for, a new goal. Which I can find in both personal life as well as my professional life.

My mind works in a binary way, 0 or 1. Do it and give it your all or don't even bother. That's probably why I'm struggling to find balance and try to achieve a mix of the above.

Did anyone go through something similar? Did you find your mojo again and how did you achieve it?  
Any constructive thoughts or resources on the topic would be very much appreciated!! Thank you

p.s.: I feel like some might say "time to get kids!". I don't want to get kids to fill a void. I think that's the wrong motivation

  
Edit: Thank you all so much for replying! I didn't expect to see so many comments

Have You Ever Lost Your Mojo?

What is the definition of success for you? I believe it's different for every person.

What is success to you?

Many things in life we aspire to possess seem to have some sort of expiration date..

A nice car, fancy house, speaker, iMac etc

  
Been always dreaming about fire and early retirement.. slowly getting there but honestly, I don't know if I'll achieve that in the near future.

  
I mean, I have so many projects I want to work on once I have all the time in the world and money is the only enemy getting in the way.

  
So, how does it feel? Is it as good as some people make it out to be?

Or does it begin to feel dull or mundane after some time passes? 

How does it feel to not have to worry about money ever again? 

I've been learning programming as a hobby for about 7 years and I consider myself pretty decent (especially w/ C++). I recently enrolled in college to get my bachelors now that I'm eligible for student aid (I was denied a fafsa override). Most of the classes so far have been easy, but I'm mostly waiting to take the junior/senior level courses. But the past 2-3 months my speech has been getting progressively worse. It's to the point that I can no longer hide it from others. It ranges in severity, but I'm mostly incoherent. I'm scared about my professional prospects, especially since it's not going away. I consider myself a good student. But most of my interactions with strangers have them feeling bad for me or thinking I'm mentally/cognitively impaired. I received a diagnosis but that's it's whole thing.



I was wondering if anyone had any relatable experiences or at the very least advice on how I should compensate.  Sorry for the dark topic. I'm still committed to programming, or at the very least academically pursuing it. I want to know what I should expect, especially when it comes to interviews.

Becoming speech disabled: what should I expect?

It should have been super simple, just an easy vertical splitter component that takes two components and can be dragged to resize either component.

My brain went completely blank on the mouse events side of things. I could not for the life of me understand how to detect a mouse drag, and whether it was dragging one way or the other. It’s something that I would generally ask AI or do some reading of docs, but it was a timed assessment so I just blew it completely. First off I should have used React, even though they said I could use Angular, I could tell during it that they were looking for specific React usage. And secondly the anxiety of having somebody watching your screen is terrible, and it didn’t at all reflect the way I actually work. I shamelessly use AI when I don’t know things, and reading the working code and going to docs for further understanding has been a great way for me to keep up speed while learning and get stuff done. Idk it just genuinely was a shitty experience. I did super well on the first three rounds, and 3 hour take home assessment, but the live coding was a complete bomb and they disqualified me immediately.

It felt super weird, and I felt like I couldn’t google anything I would usually. I really hate being monitored and I allllways bombed tests in college because of the memorization and on the spot anxiety. Feels like that all over again.

Hopefully I get over it, but I really just wish live coding assessments were not the standard. 

Just bombed a live coding assessment

I'm ready to find a new job. Today was my last straw. I work in property management, and some crazy guy threatened to hurt my family last week. I'm a hard worker, I'm good at what I do, and I'm not interested in putting up with those behaviors anymore.


I'm going to start applying for other jobs immediately. My question is, how do I explain leaving after 6 months? I feel like saying "someone threatened to hurt my family, and I'm not interested in working in that kind of environment."


True, to the point, understandable (in my opinion). What are your thoughts? What would you say? The whole situation stinks.

How do I explain leaving my job after having my family threatened?

I was a developer for five years doing it sharp internal applications for a manufacturing company. I had to leave when management changed over our new manager thought that yelling and screaming was a management strategy.
Unfortunately, I left before I had something lined up and I’m now going on five months of jobhunting and have been having real trouble getting interviews. My knowledge and skills are decent for somebody with five years of experience (though a bit niche), and I’ve had the responsibility of an entire company’s back and on me before. I think I might just not know how to hunt for a job in this space. Does anybody have any ideas? it seems like applying to jobs posted on job boards or on company websites is just about as good as pissing into the void.

* EDIT: * since it was requested, here is my most current resume: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1X_uwJobLML1ywF26vSYdXwQQJvwu0Y0M90fSypNroY0/edit?usp=sharing

Job hunt is not going well

I currently work at a midsize manufacturing company as a Process Engineer.

Early on my boss’s got wind that I know how to and even enjoy coding in my free time. So when they came to me with some side projects I happily accepted the extra responsibility because I saw it as my foot in the door to get into SWE fully.

Fast forward 10 months and now ~80% of my days are spent working on this custom react dashboard app that is intended to funnel in manufacturing data, display it interactively, provide forms for various issues, track the issues, send emails, and more.

The app and corresponding server are now approaching 10,000 LoC and I am the only one working on it while they keep requesting new features that require me to rewrite old code. I am essentially a frontend engineer, backend engineer, designer, quality engineer and… a process engineer.

I’m happy to do this, but I feel like I’m not being paid well enough for this and my duties should be transferred entirely to software engineering. The problem is, my company is somewhat cheap and they hire slowly, so I can’t expect them to hire someone to do my process engineering duties quickly nor give me a significant (50%) pay raise that would still be low for an average SWE position.

I’m also having the internal conflict of whether I should even go down this route with how bad the current SWE job market is.

How would you approach this?



Work is having me do a lot of programming and it’s not my job title

I've been with my current employer for 19 years in August. Age 48, will be 49 in September. But come August 1, the department I work in is being sold to another company. I am fully vested and the new company is honoring that.

Any guidance on what I should do - keep my current 401k with my current company? Or move it to the new company? I don't know the investment options I'll have with new company. I do know new company matches 1:1 up to 3% and 50 cents on the next 3%. Current company matches 1:1 up to 7.5%.

New job - rollover 401k to new employer or keep with old employer?

Please use this thread to have discussions which you don't feel warrant a new post to the sub. While the Rules for posting questions on the basics of personal finance/investing topics are relaxed a little bit here, the rules against memes/spam/self-promotion/excessive rudeness/politics still apply!

Have a look at the [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/financialindependence/wiki/faq) for this subreddit before posting to see if your question is frequently asked. 

Since this post does tend to get busy, consider sorting the comments by "new" (instead of "best" or "top") to see the newest posts.

Daily FI discussion thread - Thursday, July 25, 2024

Learn how to negotiate for a higher salary and better benefits when you get a job offer. Plus: Tips for boosting your earning potential.What are the best ways to negotiate for a higher salary? How can you elevate your earnings and overall compensation package? Hosts Sean Pyles and Alana Benson discuss strategies for increasing your income and negotiating for a raise to help you understand how to navigate salary discussions confidently and effectively. Alana speaks with Catherine Tinsley, Raffini Professor of Management at Georgetown University’s McDonough School of Business, about who should make the first offer, how to leverage market data, and the challenge of overcoming emotional hurdles. They also discuss the benefits of changing jobs for higher salary potential, practical advice on boosting your earning potential, and why understanding power dynamics and perceived expertise could help you come out ahead in your next negotiation.In their conversation, the Nerds discuss: salary negotiation, negotiation tactics, boost earnings, salary raise tips, new job offer negotiation, making the first offer, leveraging market data, non-monetary benefits, workplace negotiations, power dynamics, preparing for negotiations, managing emotions, marginalized group challenges, increasing income strategies, transparent salary discussions, job offer components, vacation time negotiation, remote work negotiation, company equity negotiation, continuing education negotiation, making the first salary offer, external labor market information, practical negotiation strategies, salary transparency, mutual problem solving, negotiation confidence, salary benchmarks, transparent salary data, anchoring in negotiation, power in negotiations, emotional hurdles negotiation, interdependence in negotiation, negotiation preparation, asking for a raise, and leveraging outside offers.To send the Nerds your money questions, call or text the Nerd hotline at 901-730-6373 or email podcast@nerdwallet.com.Like what you hear? Please leave us a review and tell a friend.

Learn how to negotiate for a higher salary and better benefits when you get a job offer. Plus: Tips for boosting your earning potential. What are the best ways to negotiate for a higher salary? How can you elevate your earnings and overall compensation package?  Hosts Sean Pyles and Alana Benson discuss strategies for increasing your income and negotiating for a raise to help you understand how to navigate salary discussions confidently and effectively. Alana speaks with Catherine Tinsley, Raffini Professor of Management at Georgetown University’s McDonough School of Business, about who should make the first offer, how to leverage market data, and the challenge of overcoming emotional hurdles. They also discuss the benefits of changing jobs for higher salary potential, practical advice on boosting your earning potential, and why understanding power dynamics and perceived expertise could help you come out ahead in your next negotiation. In their conversation, the Nerds discuss: salary negotiation, negotiation tactics, boost earnings, salary raise tips, new job offer negotiation, making the first offer, leveraging market data, non-monetary benefits, workplace negotiations, power dynamics, preparing for negotiations, managing emotions, marginalized group challenges, increasing income strategies, transparent salary discussions, job offer components, vacation time negotiation, remote work negotiation, company equity negotiation, continuing education negotiation, making the first salary offer, external labor market information, practical negotiation strategies, salary transparency, mutual problem solving, negotiation confidence, salary benchmarks, transparent salary data, anchoring in negotiation, power in negotiations, emotional hurdles negotiation, interdependence in negotiation, negotiation preparation, asking for a raise, and leveraging outside offers. To send the Nerds your money questions, call or text the Nerd hotline at 901-730-6373 or email <a href="mailto:podcast&#64;nerdwallet.com" rel="nofollow">podcast&#64;nerdwallet.com</a>. Like what you hear? Please leave us a review and tell a friend.

How to Negotiate Your Salary to Boost Earnings and Benefits

Multi-strategy hedge funds, also known as "pod shops," have become the hottest ticket on Wall Street. The business model is supposed to allow hedge funds to operate more efficiently. That includes deploying capital in a more productive manner and better managing risk. But how does risk management at some of the most sophisticated funds on Wall Street actually work? In this episode, we speak with Rich Falk-Wallace, formerly of Citadel and now the founder and CEO of Arcana, which provides risk management and portfolio software for multi-strat funds. We talk about how risk models are impacting investor behavior and wider markets, how multi-strat traders come up with their ideas, and the factors that go into sizing and evaluating their positions.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Multi-strategy hedge funds, also known as &#34;pod shops,&#34; have become the hottest ticket on Wall Street. The business model is supposed to allow hedge funds to operate more efficiently. That includes deploying capital in a more productive manner and better managing risk. But how does risk management at some of the most sophisticated funds on Wall Street actually work? In this episode, we speak with Rich Falk-Wallace, formerly of Citadel and now the founder and CEO of Arcana, which provides risk management and portfolio software for multi-strat funds. We talk about how risk models are impacting investor behavior and wider markets, how multi-strat traders come up with their ideas, and the factors that go into sizing and evaluating their positions.See <a href="https://omnystudio.com/listener" rel="nofollow">omnystudio.com/listener</a> for privacy information.

How the Hottest Hedge Funds on Wall Street Really Manage Risk

Shares of Lululemon hit their lowest level in more than four years after a downgrade at Citi and trouble with one of its hotly-anticipated products. What its weakness says about the state of the consumer and how you should play the space. Plus in part two of our Big Short Week spectacular, Neuberger Berman’s Steve Eisman reacts to Wednesday’s sell-off and gives us his strategy for the back half of 2024. Fast Money Disclaimer

Shares of Lululemon hit their lowest level in more than four years after a downgrade at Citi and trouble with one of its hotly-anticipated products. What its weakness says about the state of the consumer and how you should play the space. Plus in part two of our Big Short Week spectacular, Neuberger Berman’s Steve Eisman reacts to Wednesday’s sell-off and gives us his strategy for the back half of 2024. <a href="https://www.cnbc.com/fast-money-disclaimer/" rel="nofollow">Fast Money Disclaimer</a>

Consumer in a Crunch? And “The Big Short’s” Steve Eisman on How He’s Positioned for the Rest of the Year 7/25/24

Ken McElroy

To learn more about Ken's new investing opportunity: https://mccompanies.com/newdeal Use the code "Ken10" to join Ken and ...

While Everyone is Focused on the Election This Just Happened at the Border

Alex Hormozi

Want to SCALE your business? Go here: https://acquisition.com Want to START a business? Go here: https://skool.com/games If ...

How Planet Fitness Dominated the Gym Industry

Conversations With a World Champion...

Sell to Who You Can Help the Most

BiggerPockets

Calculate whether you should keep, refi, or sell in MINUTES with Property Llama: https://go.propertyllama.com/bp/ Join ...

Want Real Estate Cash Flow? DON&#39;T Buy Single-Family Rentals

Practical Wisdom - Interesting Ideas

In today's world, wealth is often linked with a flashy lifestyle and public displays of success. However, some people manage to ...

Undercover Millionaire (Strategies to Get Rich Silently)

Big Think

This interview is an episode from ‪@The-Well, our publication about ideas that inspire a life well-lived, created with the‬ ...

The mindblowing way rocks “survive” and evolve | Robert Hazen

Yahoo Finance

The fast-paced world of stock trading can be hard to maneuver, which is why Yahoo Finance welcomes on BullseyeBrief.com ...

Charles Schwab is &#39;dead money&#39;: Portfolio manager on stock

OpenAI — which Microsoft (MSFT) owns a 49% stake in — is stepping into the search engine game. In a move that could rival ...

OpenAI announces testing of new search engine, SearchGPT

Hasbro (HAS) posted better-than-expected earnings for its second quarter with adjusted earnings of $1.22 per share against an ...

Explore yesterday’s top reddit posts
on financial independence and early retirement

Featured Podcasts

Featured reddit posts

Featured youtube videos

Ken McElroy

Alex Hormozi

Alex Hormozi

Featured FIRE Apps

Acorns

E*trade

Robinhood

Coinbase

Ignitefire

Explore yesterday’s top reddit postson financial independence and early retirement

Featured Podcasts

Featured reddit posts

Featured youtube videos

Ken McElroy

Alex Hormozi

Alex Hormozi

Featured FIRE Apps

Acorns

E*trade

Robinhood

Coinbase

Explore yesterday’s top reddit posts
on financial independence and early retirement